Butterflies :)

I have really just been in one of those blah stages here lately. Things with work are really starting to take a toll on me. I'm just at the breaking point where I just want to quit. It just isn't as enjoyable as it use to be. My kids aren't helping with that either. Yeah they have their days where they are just amazing and so much fun, but the usual is them disrespecting and talking to me like I don't matter. I'm flat out sick of it! Today I had to opportunity to fill in at my old child care site and it just made me realize how miserable I am. It was the first day I actually held a conversation with an adult, laughed with my kids, played with my kids, and didn't leave wanting to cry.
On top of all that I'm trying to apply for scholarships, which in itself is a roller-coaster ride. I fill out a very flattering application, then get word back "We regret to inform you...blah blah blah!" It just makes me so mad because I've worked so hard these last four years to maintain a very high GPA, be very involved with school, etc. I may seem selfish but I feel like I should be rewarded for that and it just aggravates me when people who already have college paid for apply for the same scholarships and win!!!! I'm like come on now, be fair!
Anyways....sorry for my ranting...I'm just really bogged down with this stuff recently and I needed to get it off my chest.
So...on the flip side, I've been doing really good with staying faithful in reading the book Martha gave me and my bible. It's awesome because I'm not just reading my bible to just say I read it, I'm reading it because I find so much more delight and encouragement in it than I can get off television, the radio, or somewhere else that's useless :)
So this is really short and choppy but that's my mind for ya ha oh and I have honestly no clue why I titled this butterflies but it was the first word that came to my head.